July: Approval and Self-Esteem

Approval and disapproval – ugh, such a tough part of growing up.  Wanting to fit in, needing a place of belonging, navigating peer pressures - it takes a good measure of maturity to define who you are and become your own person. Feeling whole comes not from another person telling you that you are worthy. It comes from deciding it for yourself. It’s an inside job.

• What gave you self-esteem in adolescence?

• Have you quietly (or loudly) rebelled from family expectations or social norms?

• Whose approval or disapproval influenced your life choices? 

• Have your kids ever balked at decisions you made? How does that feel?

• What does being your own person mean to you today?

Optional: Talk about the social and cultural pressures women face, as described in the documentary Beauty Culture.

Beauty CULTure (2011, 30 min) Made for the Annenberg Space for Photography’s Beauty CULTure exhibition, which featured the work of Greenfield and other photographers who examine notions of beauty. The film was shot in a photo studio where interview subjects were first styled and made up to be “beautiful” and then asked to comment on the beauty industry and standards of beauty it promotes. The time-lapse sequence in which 6-year-old child pageant star Eden Wood is transformed from little girl to showgirl was shot through a two-way mirror. Directed by Lauren Greenfield Produced by Frank Evers and Shanah Blevins; Evergreen Pictures Director of Photography: Malik Sayeed Beauty CULTure (2011, 30 min) Gjord för Annenberg Space for Photographys utställning Beauty CULTure, där verk av Greenfield och andra fotografer som undersöker skönhetsbegreppet visades. Intervjuerna filmades i en fotostudio där de intervjuade först stylats och gjorts ”vackra” och sen ombads att kommentera skönhetsindustrin och de skönhetsnormer den främjar. Intervall-sekvensen där 6-åriga skönhetstävlings-stjärnan Eden Wood förvandlas från ett barn till en skönhetsdrottning filmades genom en tvåvägsspegel. Regisserad av Lauren Greenfield Producerad av Frank Evers och Shanah Blevins; Evergreen Pictures Filmfotograf: Malik Sayeed

Prior to your meeting, watch the 30 minute documentary called The Beauty Culture. Choose three (or more) questions to discuss in your meeting.
1. How has your interest/understanding of your beauty changed as you have aged?
2. Do you feel there is more or less pressure now to be beautiful then when we were growing up?
3. What message would you like to instill in our daughters (sons)regarding their self image and appearance?
4. If you could change one thing about our societies perception of beauty, what would that be?
5. Given the opportunity to change anything about your appearance, would you? What would it be?
6. Did anything presented in the documentary surprise you?

*** Special thanks to Seattle facilitators Brenda Wagner, Ann Williams and Joan Bailey for sharing this meeting outline.