APRIL: Acknowledging Our Mortality
“Think of the life you have lived until now as over, and see what is left
as a bonus and live it according to Nature. Love the hand that fate
deals you and play it as your own, for what can be more fitting?”
Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, 7.56-57
Beginning around age 40, we do (and mostly we don’t) think about our mortality. We rarely talk about it, even if we briefly imagine our eventual last days. When loved ones die, we might find it depressing or confusing to talk about death. Few people ask about our thoughts ~ let alone our plans ~ for dying.
In other words, with whom is a conversation about our dying even possible?
People who can talk about their dying discover that frank conversations have the opposite effect. Having a sounding board to work through these questions is more invigorating than saddening. Why? Because it gives us clarity.
The practicalities and mysteries of life and death are deeply intimate questions. Nobody has answers to what happens after we die. But death is about so much more than the afterlife. The reason to ask questions about the practicalities and mysteries of life and death is to gain clarity.
Take five deep breaths. The breath of life, given to you at birth. The intimate questions of life and death need space and breathing room.
What is the big question you have about your death?
With whom is a conversation about your dying possible?
What in your life feels yet unresolved or unfinished?
Is wanting to leave a legacy a coping strategy for our fear of dying?
What do you hope fate has in store for you as you take your last breaths?
Imagine leaving your body clothes, like a suit you’ve worn for the last time. What happens next with your consciousness?
What are the common themes of this conversation?
Takeaways.